In the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.

I, like many in our parish, made some phone calls this week. I called some of our fellow parishioners to ask them if they had any prayer requests for the 24 hour vigil that was kept this weekend. The responses that I heard revealed a lot about the character of our congregation.

People were hesitant to ask for prayers for themselves. Our brothers and sisters leapt at the opportunity to have those around them lifted up in prayer. But unlike the widow in today’s Gospel, I did not hear one person ask for justice over an opponent, indeed I did not hear anyone seek to advance his or her personal wellbeing. It was as if you all said that you didn’t mind suffering or disappointment or loss, but you wanted others to be spared or relieved of their suffering or disappointment or loss.

Now, this is indeed a touching approach to prayer, this putting others first, and you probably wouldn’t be surprised to learn that I have experienced this as the predominant mode of praying everywhere I’ve ministered. But I wonder, can we go too far in this direction? Can there be an ironic touch of pride in our selflessness?

I once brought communion to a woman whom I will call Mrs. McElroy, who lived in a nursing home in Milwaukee. My rector had told me that Mrs. McElroy had never in her life been what you’d call a real church-goer. So I was pleasantly surprised by her politeness toward me and the reverence with which she received the sacrament. When I asked her if there was anything in particular she wanted to pray for, she responded like many of us do, asking for intercession for others, only she added emphatically, "but not for myself, never for myself!" Not long after that visit, Mrs. McElroy stopped receiving communion; she stopped eating altogether, and she died. When I visited her, Mrs. McElroy was staring death in the face, contemplating the end of her life, obviously experiencing a spiritual crisis, and she was insistent on not praying for herself, or asking for prayers for herself.

I do not judge Mrs. McElroy, but my heart breaks when I think that she and I were there, present to each other, with each other in God’s special presence in the blessed sacrament…we could have prayed that God would have mercy on her, would relieve her suffering, would guide her actions. We could have prayed for Mrs. McElroy, who believe me, needed prayers at least as much as any of us. "Not for myself," she said, "never for myself."

I wonder, did somebody somewhere tell Mrs. McElroy that praying for herself or asking others to pray for her was selfish? I wonder if somebody told you that. I feel compelled to set the record straight: that is a lie! Praying for yourself is not selfish, neither is asking others to pray for you selfish. Such practices do not deprive anyone of anything. We’re not talking about a no-sum-gain in which you’re asking for a bigger slice of a finite pie. "The mercy of the Lord is everlasting." There’s plenty to go around, plenty for the asking. "Will not God grant justice to his chosen ones who cry out to him day and night?"

A holy man once said that prayer is primarily putting ourselves where God can get at us. Thus prayer is placing ourselves in God’s presence, placing our whole selves, our strength and virtue, our weakness and sins, our beauty, and our ugliness – our whole selves in God’s presence. That is prayer. Thus prayer for one’s self not only can but probably should precede our prayers for others. For how can we place others before God in prayer, unless we first place ourselves in His presence in prayer?

Therefore, this is how we can "cry out to [God] continually day and night," as our Gospel exhorts us to do. Day and night we can place ourselves in God’s presence. Day and night we can offer ourselves to Him in praise and thanksgiving. Day and night, in our homes and schools and health clubs, we can gather the needs of those around us and lift them up to God. Day and night, in traffic, in the waiting room, on the ball field, in the office, we can bend the knees of our hearts and tell God that we sure could use some more help.

Go ahead, cry out to God day and night, and cry out to your brothers and sisters in Christ to do the same on your behalf. He is eager for you to come to him, eager to hear you cries, and standing ready to respond to your needs.

Amen.